The Choice: Career or Kids?

A New Trend

For many generations, young girls were thought to prepare for marriage, motherhood and family life. On the other hand, boys and men alike, had been programmed to believe that this was a done deal. Then came the era of equal opportunities and affordable education for all. With education funded programs like GATE, the female population began expanding on their dreams; they became ambitious and career driven. Now we recognize a popular trend among women; they have invested in their academic and professional development. Staying home to procreate, nurture children and a family is not enough.

Switching Roles

How do men feel about this new trend? I guess some men are more open-minded about the situation than others. Men, by default, are becoming more actively involved in the home. Some have weighed the pros and cons and have found it to be in the best interest of their relationship to switch roles: the male homemaker or work-from-home-dad and the female breadwinner. It’s a win-win situation for all involved.  There are those guys who think this is not how nature intended it to be. They perhaps prefer the dependency syndrome of traditional women to stroke their fragile egos. I’m not really sure why. Times have changed. It takes two pairs of financially stable hands to survive in these dreaded economic times. Why not consider striking a balance?

Can Women Have It All?

There are women who want to do it all – relationships, academic and professional development, motherhood, and a functional home. But can it be accomplished without casualties? Yes, casualties! A burnt out, neglected relationship, the first victim. It will require much sacrifice to raise a child and maintain a full-time job, especially one at an executive level. Any woman who has tried it will explain there isn’t enough hours in the day, even if you sacrifice the hours at night. You will need external support from family and housekeepers.

Worst Case Scenario

On a more complicated note, some women have analysed the entire process only to conclude, it is not about childbearing, it is about everything else. Some women have tried to have children and were unsuccessful. As a result, they refocused their energy into their careers. On the other hand, there are women who choose to postpone or bypass motherhood because they recognise parenthood to be an option, not an obligation. They find education and financial independence gratifying and fulfilling.

It is in the best interest of couples to discuss matters of procreation before entering into a serious relationship. While it is a woman’s right to postpone or bypass motherhood to focus on her career, she must be sensitive to the needs of her partner who may want to father children. Careful consideration of all the arguments presented is key. At the end of the day, a couple should ignore social pressure and do what’s best for their unit. Who knows? The woman may become pregnant and it changes her entire focus. Nothing is set in stone.



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